February 28, 2007

Okay, I feel better now, I just needed to break the monotony of the work week.


Busy weekend.

February 24, 2007

Well I am off to fight traffic and start the weekend. Got a full social calender this weekend. Well actually my nephew does and I just show up.

Saturday it is Bounce House time, and Uncle Boski gets chased by 8 year old’s. Thankfully they will not have torches and clubs like I have experinced in the past.

After that, the Better Half and I are going to Pauley Pavilion to watch UCLA vs. Stanford. I have never been and I have always wanted to go. All these years and I have never gone to this Sports shrine. Afterwards we may fit in some wandering through Westwood.

But before the game, we will be stopping up in Culver City. The Better Half wants to go to Serfas which is a kitchen wonderland, you name it they have it. It is always fun wandering through the aisles. Sadly, I have a feeling I will not be with my wife at that point, since I will be camped out side of the NFL Network Studios, crying. I will be groveling at the door asking for some NFL Combine scraps. In short not a pretty sight. Again I present my shame for all to mock.

Sunday it will be day two of the festival of my nephew with a party at Casa de Mom. Which should be a nice time.

So now I am off, please take some caulk and spare tires before you go.

Maybe I was not wrong in

February 24, 2007

… my original assessment of Britney needing to be kenneled.

Thankfully she’s back into rehab, yet again (I hope they told her that going in and out of rehab like will not get her free frozen yogurt any sooner).

But I have to ask, if she does get out again, will they need Animal Control?

Look she went feral last time she was out on the streets.

Seriously how close are we to seeing her attack humans?

In this man’s humble opinion, not very far.

Right now I think the best thing for the kids is to let them be raised by wolves. Look it may have worked for these guys. Look the wolves would have more manners and be a little bit cleaner than K-Fed and Brit, but again it is just this man’s opinion.

I really should be ashamed that I have taken the time to even care about Brit, considering how f’ed up things are in the world (the destruction of the Constitution, the Iraq war, coming soon the Iran War, global warming, Darfur and so on and so on), but I am sorry. I just get so mesmerized when Hillbillies, Chavs (for our British fans) or dumb ass celebs go astray from the law and reality.

There I have admitted it, it is the first step in recovery.

Looks like he is going to need more than 10,000 points to get another life.

February 22, 2007

Adam “Pac Man” Jones Defensive Back for the Titans is waging a one man battle against the Cincinnati Bengals. To show who is the is the king of the Numerous Felony League.

It appears that during the chaos (Thanks to Jason Whitlock at AOL) errrr I mean the fun that was NBA’s All Star Weekend, that Mr. Pac Man ran had a situation.

Apparently the NFL and the law do not appreciate when you go into a strip club, bite the bouncer and leave the club after your friend shoots three people. All of this stemming from an incident with a trash bag filled with $81,000 dollars. (Deadspin)

Hey I think the man is innocent and the police are looking for the wrong guy. In fact we all know who really behind this. It was these guys, they are still pissed at Pac Man.

It makes sense. After all those years of being chased, eaten and cut out from the profits. It was only a matter of time before they were going to get back at Pac Man.

So Britney got out of the kennel again.

February 21, 2007

I am sorry I mean rehab, that was a low blow and I apologize to all dogs and dog owners for that last remark.

I think this article from Defamer puts it nicely. This is getting ridiculous.

So Brit you could not handle rehab, or is re-rehab now since she has already bolted once. Oh well does is it matter? She probably out freebasing tweaking on Meth and Cheetos. But congrats Brit you should be getting that the “Rehab is for Quitters” card from Mrs. Lohan shortly.

I am probably not the only who thinks those two kids are so screwed. You know things are bad when Kevin Federline is the one who looks like the respectable one.

Happy Presidents Day

February 19, 2007

I hope everyone is enjoying their Presidents Day. I am enjoying is so much I am working. Well no matter, I have lit the candles and left 8lbs of aged deli meat at my shrine for Grover Cleveland, my favorite President. He edges out Ulysses S. Grant as my favorite. I know I can hear you now, “Mr. Boski those are odd choices, wouldn’t a better selection be Lincoln, Kennedy or Washington. Even for comedy purposes couldn’t you just go with James K. Polk?”

To all of you I say yes, those are great suggestions, but I have my reasons.

Sure Grant’s administration was racked with scandal. Along with not properly handle a volatile situation that would scar the nation for many decades after (Reconstruction and sadly not Tales of Reconstruction). But after toiling on a paper I wrote as a college senior on him and Mark Twain, I have a soft spot for the guy. Also that paper kicked ass, if I have not mentioned it like a millions times.

Come January 2009, as I have mention before he will be off the hook for most corrupt two term administration when George steps down, that is if he does step down. Unlike Shrub, U.S. Grant won his elections. His biggest mistake was trusting the wrong people and not doing anything to change it.

As for my man Grover, he had it all:

He was a Gilded Age President

He won an election with support of the Mugwumps

He’s on the $1,000 dollar bill ,

He was our only non consecutive termed president

And he was the first recorded Presidential Baby Daddy.

That is the Royal Flush Presidential frippery.

It trumps these tasty presidential nuggets:

James Polk’s “K”

Chester A. Arthur’s’ facial hair

William Henry Harrison dying only after a month

President Garfield hated Monday’s

Harry Truman beating Dewey in a game of horse that turned the 1952 election in his favor. Dewey could not duplicate Truman’s rim rocking tomahawk jam.

Old Pork and Beans – William Howard Taft could beat box like a young Doug E Fresh, sadly there was no Russell Simmons or Rick Rubin around to sign him.

But in my search of useless Presidential knowledge I have found a new shinning star of Presidential nonsense.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury I present to you Warren G. Harding.

Not only did he have G in his name, the man was a G by making sure the White House was stocked with liquor during Prohibition.

Warren was also a player with the ladies while in the White House. He too may have Federlined a couple of his lady acquaintances. This did not make Mrs. Harding very happy.

Had the largest feet ever of a sitting or standing president, size 14. If it was not for his scandals it would have been the Warren G. Harding Big Ass Clown Shoe Bridge, not the Golden Gate.

Supposedly lost a china set that belonged to Benjamin Harrison in a poker game. White House historians say false, just like John Quincy Adams victory over the Martian King in a backgammon match. I say they are lying and that both are true.

Four Words – Tea Pot Dome Scandal

Lastly the one that may move him into the # 1 spot, Harding did not die of a heart attack. He may have been the first case of Pac-Man Fever. Thanks to that stupid time machine that William McKinley left lying around.

But to today I close this salute to President’s day with this question that I would like to throw out to you after reading this Yahoo article

Bush compares Revolutionary, terror wars.

Um, Mr. President I think you may have things mixed up. You see your actions are more along the lines of the other George involved with the Revolutionary War. You know King George, but unlike him Mr. Bush you are truly mad and not suffering from a medical condition that King George was.

So my question is this, if George Washington knew that the future of America held George W. Bush, would he have just surrendered shortly after Bunker Hill?

Thank you everyone, please enjoy the tacos.

Have you seen this man?

February 15, 2007

He is wanted for grand theft. He is stealing this season of Extras. Which is no easy task mind you when you have moments like:

– David Bowie’s appearance where Andy thinking he finally getting some respect, but ends up with Mr. Bowie breaking into spontaneous song about how Andy’s pathetic life.

– Orlando Bloom getting shot down over and over by Maggie

– Getting caught in a bathroom stall by the BAFTA organizers after his agent (seen above) drags him in trying to get him to snort some Colombian Marching Powder with him and British comedy actor Ronnie Corbet (who looks like the woman that Andy lost his virginity when he was 28 and drunk, but that another story) and now Andy is banned from either winning or going to the BAFTA, well he can go to the Welsh BAFTA’s.

– Chris Martin doing his PSA all the while he is trying to push the new Coldplay Greatest Hits

– Then there is Daniel Radcliffe, Henry Potter himself, trying way too hard and quiet unsuccessfully to try to be some kind of Lothario on set. Who in his stumbling attempt to be something he is not, accidentally flings a condom that lands Dame Daine Rigg head.

Add those moments with the bumbling of his agent and you have priceless comedy. I did not think Mr. Gervais could top the Office, but this is getting to that level.

So damn you Ricky, damn you and your wonderful show.

So if you are not watching it, I command you do to so!