Time Warner making things easy.

The saga continues.

Last evening we received a packet from Time Warner tell us about how awesome they are. And how they are here to help us, the great unwashed. That there awesomeness will be so amazing that it may appear that we will be paying more for their digital cable. But it’s only because it will be so mind bendingly bitching, that we would have given them the money anyway. My wife looked over the material first and wanted me to wait till I had finished dinner to let me look it. Her fear was that the sheer amazement that Time Warner was laying out may cause me to use my fork as a weapon. I glad she did, I really did not want to gouge out my own eye because of the awesomeness.

When I got to review the packet, my wife told me, “Read this and tell me if this makes and f#@$ing sense. I have a college degree and this makes no sense at all.” I did, and she was right. You could not figure out what the hell they were trying to sell, was it apart of the Digital Classic tier which is not offered, or is it Sports Classic Digital Tier with relish, or was it apart of Digital Kick In The Groin tier. It made the poor hampster in my head hurt. Trying to figure out String Theory would have been easier. It was so complicated that Steven Hawking would look at this, get up out of his chair and go hit someone in the mouth with a canned ham.

Oh and to make it worse, those bastards are taking away some channels that I liked. Even with all my e-mails and faxes, they still have not even come close the make the deal with the NFL Network. So I do not even know if I will even have the chance to be gouged for that. Even if I get the Sports Tier, I will get a lot of crap I do not want. Please, please let me pick channels I want and not for the ones I don’t. The Boski house will still get a lot channels, and we would be very happy to have you in our home, but instead you keep call in the gimp to make sweet sweet love to me.

The worst part of this is may be on Sunday. I have my fantasy basketball draft. It is a league with guys I went to high school with. Sadly one of the guys now works for Time Warner. I worry I am going to walk in, say hello, shake his hand, ask him about his family and then hit him with a chair. This tops last years draft when I showed up, with White Sox World Series gear, which should be no problem, but one of the teams is run by the brother a pitcher who had some issues with White Sox catcher Mr. Pierzynski. Now if I had shown up in an A.J jersey, then I would have gotten a well deserved beat down.

Now I have to do some research and present RFP to my wife on getting a Dish. I am going to have to wow her. So I will really need to go crazy with the animations of the ol‘ PowerPoint.


2 Responses to Time Warner making things easy.

  1. Julie says:

    One word: DirecTV. I get the NFL channel. And TiVo. And a ton of other channels. For about $55 a month. Break free of the Time Warner prison!

  2. Boski93 says:

    I know I have to get on the stick about this. The Better Half wants me to put together a compelling arguement for DirectTV.

    P.S. Can we still be friends since my Broncos have to come to Pittsburgh this Sunday, and it would be really nice if you could tell the Steeler to lay down and let us win, since we were nice enough to lose last years AFC Championship Game.

    P.P.S I hope your teeth are doing alright.

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