Watch Watch 2005 Day 5

August 31, 2005

It’s Over. Due to low ratings and lack of ingenious ways to talk about how I forgot my watch at my gym we have ended this segment.

So thank you watch for the couple of months we had together. I hope many happy days for you if you taken and then donated to some one who could really use it. If not then I hope you develop jagged rusty edges and subject said hooligan to tetanus.

In it’s place we will showing never aired of episodes of Push Nevada.

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Summer Colds

August 31, 2005

Suck a lot of ass.

Last night while at the KDH’s home I just felt like crap and when I got home I just kept feeling more and more like Britney Spears’ TV show “Chaotic“. I felt empty, sluggish, incoherent and oozing of mucus. I am sorry if I have grossed anyone out, and I would like to apologize to mucus for putting into the same category as Britney Show. A flower bouquet is on the way.

So I tried to the right thing and cancel the cold by pounding an Airborne, getting some sleep, drinking water and getting drugs this morning. But like “Chaotic” I am still feeling the effects, kinda like radiation poisoning. As I sit here blogging it is still not getting any better.

Loud Sneeze

Loud Sneeze

groan

Loud Sneeze

Great my nose has just clocked its 6th straight sub-4:00 mile.

If I find who gave this to me I hit smack their spleen with my shoe.


Roto Team Assemble!

August 31, 2005

Last night had another Roto Draft. This time I was actually able to attend. So after eight hours of cramming for the draft and goofing off I drove up to the land of Gracious Living to go to the King of the Desert Hooligans home. My careful planning, extensive research and inhalation of cleaning products helped me assemble a team that will make mediocrity shutter.

So please let me know what you think of the greatest team ever named after a place kicker who now does NFL broadcasting in Spanish.

So here is “In Fuad We Trust”

QB Tom Brady
QB Eli Manning

RB Jamal “Big House” Lewis
RB Kevin Jones
RB T.J. Duckett
RB Eric Shelton

WR Chad “Pepto” Johnson
WR Isaac “the” Bruce
WR Eric Moulds
WR T.J. “Hooker” Houshmandzadeh

TE Todd “Uriah” Heap – Sorry to go all Berman on that one.
TE “North” Dallas “40” Clark

DEF – Jacksonville
DEF – Denver

K – Ted “The Motor City Madman” Nuget

Season tickets are on sale at the box office or any participating DMV offices.

In Fuad We Trust Football 2005

Behold the Wrath of Fuad!


Watch Watch 2005 Day 4 !

August 30, 2005

Irvine CA – Faux News reports that Mr. Boski is now asking Aruban officials to assist with the investigation of his missing watch.

“Well they have been practicing haven’t they?” Mr. Boski asked during his own news conference held out in the parking lot of the 24 Hour Fitness in Irvine. “But if they are no help I will go get Geraldo. I know then we will get shit found. Look at what he did for Al Capone. He found a lot of Al Capone’s nothing. Now that says something, doesn’t it?”

Mr. Boski then rambled on, “Look I have got my beat up old Swatch and we will get through. I just hope the ruffian or ruffians who absconded my watch, even though it was through my own negligence, never have the right time on that watch.”

At this point Mr. Boski then lit some sparklers and yelled to the crowd which consisted of himself, Cory Hart, a landscaper, Big Foot and his bride Nia Pebbles, three Falco impersonations, and members of the press (Faux News, Cat Fancy for Seniors, Guns & Gardens, and Highlights). Mr. Boski then discussed his future plans.

“I am working on a Broadway Musical about The War Of Jenkins Ear. The music will be scored by Chumbawamba and it will be performed by chimps. This will raise Broadway to new levels of excellence according to USDA standards. My watch is gone, but I am not going to pay a lot for this muffler”.

Then Mr. Boski ran to his vehicle and drove off leaving everyone stunned, except for Mr. Hart who expressed anger.

“That dude was my f’ing ride. Now I am going to be late for my shift at IHOP.”


Voluptas Spectatio Rome

August 30, 2005

I probably butchered that, but hey it’s a dead language people. Sunday, Team Boski watched Rome and I enjoyed it. It was what I was hoping for. The review I had read that it moves slow due to the fact that this is and HBO BBC joint. Which I did not find slow at all. It moved well. Also if it is anything like Dirty War then I will be impressed. Now they just have to keep it up without going overboard. I think of this as a cross between Cleopatra and Gladiator for scope and “I Claudius” for the political and personal intreage.

I know that some of the history and story lines are as fabricated like most of what we get from the administration, but that is fine, I understand. The Romans did a great job at recording their leaders and their military actions, but did little of or nothing on the common person.

I am curious on how far they will take the series. Will we get to Caligula, Claudius or even Nero. Or will they have Larry David time travel? Hell, no matter what they do it would still be better than the majority of network TV.


New Orleans and Gulf Coast Post Script.

August 30, 2005

Well it looks like it ended up being nearly as bad as they feared. And that we will be discovering the depths of the damage for weeks to come, not only in human life, but of property, infrastructure and environmental damage. I will not bore you will any thoughts and rants other than, if you are , or will be looking to profit from this disaster. Then I hope they make a nice cozy room for you in hell. This goes from oil companies to store owners gouging $100 for a bottle of water. Help your fellow man not your bottom line!

So my thoughts and prayers go out to everyone who suffering from this disaster. And the hope that they will be able to put their lives back together. Also my thoughts go out to all the household pets who got caught up in this. They didn’t barging for this and they can’t just hop in the minivan and drive away, or run like animals in the wild. Okay, I am sucker for animals there I have said it.

Okay I got that out. I am most likely done with that here on the Blog of fun. You will be hearing about it everywhere you go, and I do not have anything I could add. So we will return this AMC Pacer of fun back on the highway of hilarity, or at least surface streets of snickering.


Wow time files.

August 29, 2005

When you are working at not doing work. Today has been blur of checking e-mail, reading up on sports and blogging and bombarding the blogwaves with my obtuse and random comments. I am not a blog stalker, but I do play one on TV. So to all those whose blogs I have blacked with my presence I apologize, but it’s all your own fault for making such entertaining reading. So I am looking to admit myself to a clinic. I can not afford Betty Ford, so I going to try to weasel my way into the Caroline Lavinia Scott Harrison Clinic and Fondue Shack.